Thanks puree for ur regular visit to my site for update. Nonetheless I am ashamed that I haven been updating. To be frank, working life has robbed me of all my time, I dont even have time to really rest. I barely even have the luxury to come online to check my email let alone blog. Sad case huh?! I hate it that I dont have life. I need to spend time with my family.

Anyhow, quick update. Life has been hectic. At work, my progress has been stagnant and it becomes blurry of what my future path will be. Taking 3 weeks to learn the same thing is simply a waste of my time. I am much better at that. The paper work is like child play and they are making a mountain out of a molehill. Just cos they take along time to grasp all these doesnt mean the same for me. I have a high intellectual capacity for this cos I am trained to do things that way. HELLO!!! Just labour costing...how tough can it get?!!! Wasting my time. Now they need 1 month to teach me on payroll....CRAP!! Then when can i be transferred back to HQ...Kinda feeling shortchanged. I am going to talk to my boss and probably that HR woman who hired me. Gonna demand a proper explanation. I am not going to sit and wait for things to happen.

One more update! I got my PR finally!! Big thing for me. Finally, I can start travelling again and not being on hold with just bloody one stamp on my passport which forbid me to leave the daRn country. Probably need to go get my card soon.

Third. Yes! My hometown is in a big mess now. My parents are safe but its hard to say anything for sure. So I gotta call my parents everyday to check on their safety. It is very worrying and I cant rest my mind at ease. My dad has too much a fixed assets there and its worrying if there is a big mess during the transition if there is ever a change. Noentheless I really wish all those that has passed away during this demostration die for a cause. That cause has to be fought hard by all the countrymen with one heart.

Forth, I have decided to accept my mom's offer to SERIOUSLY consider this blardy 33 years bald man with beer belly and stained teeth. So I am going to meet him for a meal if he wants to come over sg to see me. I have to start somewhere somehow. But my mind is pretty set on rejecting him. I am just going to be gracious about it and not reject him profusely just in case my parents forced me into marriage. So I am going to handle this like an adult.

Finally, I have met his family and had dinner with them. His family is lovely. It is nice being around them cos they are so loving. They seem to welcome me and I felt the warmth. However, I am not sure if they really geniunely like me cos they love their son so much, they will accept whoever he brings home. His mom is already hinting to the both of us about marriage. Kinda funny. We are doing fine but it is hard to find time to spend quality time with him alone cos I have my work and my family. Even though there are still alot of issues we have yet to iron out, I feel that he is not ready to face them together with me. As much as I feel unsettled about all those, I am giving him all the time he needs to learn to adapt and change. Most likely not very soon cos he claims he is very lazy to go think through all these for me. Yah!! I feel the love huh?!!

Sometimes I wonder what kind of value to attach to those words he will say to me. But I am giving him time to realize and just waiting patiently. Sometimes I doubt whether if he ever spare a thought for me and my feelings. Like how he happily place his happy moments photoSSS with him and his ex on his facebook which some of my friends have access to and been happily questioning me about it. I wonder if he knows the kind of difficult situation i will face to answer to these people who are concerned about my welfare. I sound like a total fool and ediot to all my friends cos I am making sure he doesnt look bad. I mean I really dont mind all these. If he is meant to stray, he can go ahead cos he knows I never tie him down. But me not minding doesnt mean he could do everything he pleases. I feel all these speak volume. I need a very thoughtful guy to be my man. Someone who is 細心 and ti tie, who spare a thought for me in everything. That means he places me before himself, aint it? I mean if he really loves me, he would have thought of how difficult it would be for me to explain to my friends and if he loves me enough, he wouldnt want to put me through all these. Am I asking too much? When I am not even making noise and jealous or demanding explanation about his ex. Eh! They still meet up and I am cool about it. How much more could I be generous? He asked her out to accompany him to a show when he didnt even ask me cos I was working. Then he ate dinner with her and sent her home. He couldnt pick up my call when I called after work cos he was sending her home. I didnt even make noise that he didnt even pick me up from my work. What more can I do? Now I sound like a total ediot huh?

But I really dont mind. That's his freedom! Noone knows anyway. But placing such intimate photos on facebook when some of the common friends have access to make things alittle tough esp when people start questioning about how serious he is about me. Hmm......those questions I have no answer to when I am under attack. Yes yes yes! I know it is about the 2 of us but i feel that he doesnt have to make me look bad either when I am always trying to protect his integrity. In addition, his words are hurting when he refused to talk about all these just cos he doesnt want to be bothered with it. I know he is stressed with his own work so I kinda gather from there where I really stand in his life. I am now learning to just settle for where he placed me. Do you know that he doesnt want people that know both of us to know about us? WHY? He explained he is uncomfortable. A reason I couldnt fathom. Not that I need our relationship to be known to all but just that I couldnt understand his reason. To me, it reads like he is ashamed to face some facts that could never be changed. In short, he is ashamed of me. That is how it comes across to me.

Other than all these, we are fairly good cos we dont quarell. Even when I am pissed with him, I will tell him nicely that I am pissed and that we should talk another day and he also wont do anything about it but just wait until I cool down then talk to me again. Yah!!! You guys feel the love? Frankly speaking, you will ask me what I am doing with him. I finally understood what it meant by love is blind. I know he aint a perfect human being and I am accepting all of his shortcoming from my expectation of a perfect boyfriend. I mean he never complains anything about me except that I am not spending time with him, why do I impose so much expectation on him right?

Guess I am still learning to cope with life lesson #1 "Managing expectation". Dont mistake me! We have awesome time laughing at one another for all the silliest things we do whever we see each other. It is fun to have him around la cos he is so nice to make fun of.

Hmmm...........Thats about it, my work, my family and my love life.